The Clog.

I fell a little more deeply in love with Uriah last night. Not that there was any empty space inside my heart that wasn't already filled to the brim with my love for him. 

Yesterday we worked together to get the clog out of my breast that was causing me such awful pain. It's a physical and mental pain, you see breastfeeding can be a real mind trip. Being so attached physically to a small human wears on me mentally. There are many sacrifices I have had to make, and I would never regret any of them, but still. It takes a lot of me.

So when I got that nasty clog I was almost resentful. Why why why? And how was I going to get the stupid thing out with a toddler who only likes to nurse for no more than 3 minute intervals (and a broken breast pump?)

We were supposed to go over to my in laws for dinner, but I couldn't even put a bra on. It was getting closer to dinner and Uriah was getting a little tired. We snuggled on the couch and watched a show then I pulled him into my lap to nurse. He didn't wiggle around and try to stand up, he just snuggled in, stroked my chest with his hand and nursed away. It was so relaxing. And he stayed like that for about 15 minutes, a record as of late. When he finished he sat up and smiled at me and I knew right then he had released the clog. I kissed him a million times as we laughed and did a celebration dance. He did it, we did it, and I'm so proud of us. One more obstacle we overcame together. We are that much closer now in the never ending, always changing rhythm of mama and child.