Week 5 oh... hey hormones

Apparently I forgot to post this one.  This is from last week.  Week 5 is here!  My baby has a heartbeat now!  Look at you grow little one!
My body is slowly starting to change,  and it seems like it will take forever for me to have a baby bump, but I am trying to enjoy every stage of pregnancy,  so here is to week 5!
My hormones have stepped up their game, yesterday I was having ridiculous mood swings at work, I felt like a crazy person. My nasal passages are stuffed up.  Also my "girls" are growing so quickly that my shoulders are aching everyday. They look great,  and they are excited to perform the one task they were created for,  feeding the baby! But man,  my shoulders are having a hard time bearing the weight.
Side note: went to the store for icy hot for my achy shoulders,  and icy hot has a pregnancy warning on it! For Real? Ok I'm pregnant,  I'm not a little piece of fragile China. It's so annoying!
Anyways,  I went to natural grocers today to get some coconut oil,  and I also found some special coconut water, and let me tell you,  it is the best thing ever. It is leagues better than any coconut water I've ever had before.  I LOVE it! It was almost 5 dollars for only 16 oz but I can't have wine,  beer,  or coffee, so it's totally worth it! 
This week we get to visit my in Laws in depot Bay for a little coast trip. It will be nice to have a relaxing day at the beach.  Reggie just loves the ocean.  Hopefully Zach will be able to build me a chalk board this week.
My husband and I are facing many big decisions and there are so many different ways we could go,  so we have been trying to navigate through those options. We are just praying that God makes it blatantly obvious to us which path to take.
I'm just so blessed to have my husband,  he is willing to do anything for our family,  and he helps me manage my emotions,  and as crazy as I can feel, he never makes me feel like my emotions are invalid or silly. He rocks!

My hopes and dreams becoming actualized

This week has definitely been one of the best weeks of my life (only second to my wedding.) I have been waiting for this for what seems like forever! I have been imagining this for months!  I imagined how I would feel when I got my positive pregnancy test,  I imagined how I would tell my husband,  and how he would react!  I imagined telling our family, and seeing the joy on their faces. I imagined how I would feel to have a little baby inside of me.
Well now I know,  and it is even more than I could have imagined.
I took a pregnancy test on Sunday morning, I knew it was going to be negative because I felt like I was pmsing like no one's business.  I just felt like it wasn't our month,  and maybe next time,  but probably not because I was ready to give up. It is so so hard not getting your hopes up when you want something so badly. Anyways,  after my big fat negative Zach and I went up to Portland to help my sister and her family move to the apartment under theirs.  I had the best job of taking care of Ella and Wesley while everyone else did the heavy lifting.  Wesley just kept looking at me with the sweetest smiles, and it made me feel a lot better about my negative test, at least I have my family right? Ella kept me laughing because she is the best conversationalist.  She says the most amazing things. Anyways the kids made me feel better because it's hard to be sad when they keep smiling at you. Mollie made us homemade gourmet margaritas in her vitamix, um,  amazing!  However it really didn't make me feel good.  It made me nauseated. It was super annoying because it was so yummy. Aunt flow didn't visit me Sunday.... And she also didn't visit me on Monday.
I was thinking how rude it was of her to tease me like that,  but I guess she isn't known for being nice to anyone. Monday night I picked up some more tests because why not? I figured it would be another negative,  but I thought I would try anyways.
Tuesday I woke up and peed in a cup,  got my test out and dipped it,  put it on the counter,  and layed down on the floor and prayed that I wouldn't be too disappointed and that God's will would happen one way or the other.  I peeked my head up and saw.... THE LINE!!!! I quickly pulled all of the other tests I had out of the cupboard and opened them and started dunking them.  I even used the big fancy clear blue test. Pregnant,  pregnant,  pregnant!!!
I sat down on the floor and started crying and praying.  How could I be so lucky? How could there be a little baby in me? I was flooded with the most happiness I have ever felt. It was the best news I've ever gotten! I'm going to be a mom!
I had to decide how to tell Zach.  It was 6 am and he was sound asleep. I let him sleep longer before I told him the life changing news. In the meantime I just prayed and wrote my letter to my little sprout. Around 8 I just couldn't wait any longer. I made a collar out of ribbon for Reggie.  I put a little tag on it that said big brother.  I woke Zach up and told him to look at the collar I made for Reggie. I'm one of those people who always put things on my dog so Zach want entirely impressed.... Until he read his tag.  I handed him the positive test and he was like, "really?! Go take ten more" ha ha silly man,  I already took three.
We spent the morning praying and talking about how excited we were.  I don't think I've ever prayed more in my whole life.
We started telling our family,  and it was so awesome to hear everyone so excited for us.  We are surrounded by so much support and love.  Our little baby is going to have wonderful grandparents,  beautiful aunties, and awesome uncles. Not to mention 10 cousins. Lucky little duck we have here.
We still haven't gotten to tell everyone yet, but after today all of our family should know.
We are so unbelievably happy to start our journey with our little butt chin baby!

My little sprout

Dear little sprout,
Today I just found out I get to meet you in 9 months.  I don't know you yet and you don't know me,  but your daddy and I have been praying our hearts out for you.
You see,  your daddy and I decided that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives loving a baby.  We want to spend the rest of our lives raising you, laughing with you,  playing with you,  and helping you through all the struggles in life that just don't make sense.  We have been praying that God would bless us with a baby.  It wasn't easy and your mommy got really impatient at times, but your daddy encouraged me every step of the way. I can't believe that we are the lucky parents that get to raise you!  I love you little sprout, I love you so unbelievably much.  It really doesn't even make sense.  You are the light of my world.
Some day soon you are going to start letting mommy know you are in there.  You will probably make me puke a lot,  you might make me get chubby.  You might give me stretch marks. But I know you will make me the happiest mommy in the whole world. I'm ready little sprout.  My body is completely yours. I love you so much! 
Your daddy is still sleeping and when he wakes up I can't wait to tell him about you.  He is going to pee his pants. You get front row tickets to the show. 
I love you little sprout. 

Weirdness is considered the norm now

If I had one day where I just felt completely normal and I felt like myself, than I would think something is wrong at this point.  I have been nauseated for like 3 days now. But is it morning sickness? Probably not. I'm only 6 days past ovulation,  it's too early to be morning sickness,  and it's way too early to test. So here I am,  just sitting here wanting to puke not knowing why my body hates me.
My husband and I tried to move the furniture around, and pretty much it is in the only place that works.  It made me more upset than it should have.  I just really wanted something new,  and it was disappointing. My poor husband.  He looked so confused as to why I just wanted to sit there and pout.
Did I mention my husband has a beard now? I think it will increase our chances of getting pregnant. Tmi? So sorry ;)

Charting

I started beginning to wonder why I wasn't pregnant,  and I was very unsatisfied with everyone's answer of "don't worry,  it'll happen" so I took matters into my own hands and I started charting.  Mollie gave me a book about fertility,  and I read it,  and now I feel completely enlightened about my cycle. I wish every woman could read this book. Anyways,  through charting I have learned I am on cycle day 20 and I didn't even ovulate until 4 days ago.  Most people assume ovulation happens 14 days into your cycle,  but that isn't the case for everyone.  So the dumb app I was using was telling me to do the deed at the wrong time!
Also I have learned that my luteal phase is too short. I'm really hoping that it is long enough this month,  because if it is we should be golden. Come on hormones! Stick around! Also what it could mean is I could have a chemical pregnancy which is when an egg is fertilized but the leal phase is too short,  so it doesn't have time to implant.  I don't even want to think about that happening.
If my luteal phase keeps coming up short I honestly don't know how to fix it,  but I hope I won't have to find out.
In other news life has been pretty good. Nothing to exciting has happened,  Zach and I have gotten to spend a lot of time together,  and it has been so lovely.  I conned him into going to the store with me last night to make milkshakes. They were superb.
Oh,  we started apartment hunting in Salem, and so far my little ball of fur is too big for everyone.  Kinda rude.  Since when can we discriminate by weight? My poor dog is going to be all self conscious now!

Christmases

This last week has been pretty eventful! We've had Zach's Christmas party for work,  there was a Christmas celebration with Zach's mom's side of the family,  Zach and I had our own special Christmas eve together,  we had Christmas at the Jacobson's and we had our makeup Christmas with the Gilbert's yesterday. Whew.  We were showered with lots of fun stuff,  it's like we were getting married all over again! I don't know what we did to deserve it,  but it was so fun. Although it was a lot of traveling and we hate leaving our poor Lil pup at home,  it was so nice seeing everyone.  We got to see every one of our family members except for my mom and Bill. If everything goes as planned my mom and Bill will be able to move up to Oregon in time for next Christmas so that we won't have to miss them again.
We have such an awesome family, I honestly can't think of a better environment to raise our kids.  They are going to be loved by so many grandmas, grandpas, aunties,  uncles,  and cousins.
I am so excited about 2014! I'm praying it will be a year that brings us a little bundle of joy, but even if that isn't the case we are still moving forward.  Zach is going back to school,  we are moving to Salem,  and if Zach gets his way then we will probably get another doggy (can you believe Reggie isn't enough for him?) The Holiday season is a great way to end the year,  is so nice to reflect on the year surrounded by so much love. Have I mentioned how great my fam bam is? Oh yeah,  we should be getting our wedding pictures back soon,  finally! !!

Helpful souls

Thank goodness for my family! Yesterday I had to work both jobs while being sick, and I was tired and moody and the only thing that got me through the day is my ridiculous cousin Samantha. She is one of the funniest people I know, and I needed a good laugh. My spirits also got a boost because she is so encouraging.
Today is my day off, and on my days off I like to call my sister Mollie while I'm bee bopping around the house. I expected the conversation to be about how frustrating it is to not get pregnant when you expect it to be so easy. Apparently my sister's week has been a rough one, and she told me all about it. It really put things in perspective for me. I mean really Carol? What are you complaining about? Being a mom is hard, and I need to have more patience in waiting to be one.