It's kinda funny, before I got pregnant I always looked at mothers as like this sort of cult, like they all talked about diapers and crawling and first words, and the only way to relate to them was by having a kid. I was also afraid of most moms because a lot of moms come with very strong opinions on just about everything. I was afraid of being judged for making my own parenting decisions. What I didn't expect was how amazingly encouraging moms are. I've never once felt alone in this journey, and for that I am so grateful. I also have learned that although I will be judged for making some decisions, I really could care less. I am very confident in making decisions for my family. I also have learned to respect other mommies for making their own decisions for their families too. Now that I'm having a baby I realize that for every decision there is to make about parenthood, there are a million circumstances that influence the decider. I speak for myself and my family only about whats best for us, and sometimes only myself, because believe it or not, Zach and I don't agree on everything, shocker, right?
I've been thinking a lot about all of the first-trimester mommies out there who are experiencing the newness of pregnancy, but haven't announced it yet because of the fear of miscarriage. Thank goodness I had my sisters, my family, and my best friends to help me through that stage because the 1st trimester is rough! I wish women felt more comfortable announcing their pregnancies sooner for this reason. I actually wanted to announce sooner than I did because I was SO EXCITED about it, but I felt like people would judge me for doing it so early. How sad is that? So if you are in your first trimester and want to talk about how crazy pregnancy is with someone, talk to me because I know how you feel, and no one should have to feel like they have to hide such an exciting thing from everyone.
On that note, if anyone is trying to conceive a baby read all of my blogs on how frustrating it is. IT SUCKS! And I only had to try for four months before we got our little guy. I won't tell you to "just don't stress about it, it will happen" because I know that isn't helpful. Not everyone gets pregnant immediately, and people don't talk publicly about the struggle to get pregnant because it's a tough journey. It should be talked about because women going through this need support. Every month when I cried because I got my period I needed the support from my family and friends, and I'm lucky to have them, but not everyone does. For some it's a silent battle, and if that's you, I'm here for you!
Anyways! I have been feeling better, I'm not as dizzy and my heart palpitations aren't bothering me like they were because I'm kinda getting used to it. My dreams have also gotten a lot better and I think it is because I've let go of a lot of stress. I talked to my midwife and I am still going to go to a doctor to talk about my symptoms and the possibility of me having an ulcer. It helps that my little guy is SO strong now, and when he kicks me I really feel it, and it is the most comforting thing ever before I fall asleep. He is already such a sweet baby for helping me feel better, thanks bud.
I have so much to look forward to for this pregnancy and although it is going to be a HOT summer with a huge belly (sweat EVERYwhere) we have so many fun things going on. I'm excited for many weekends with family, and a camping trip with Uriah's Aunty Lola and Uncle Dustin in Washington. He is a lucky little fetus.
With Kellen we started trying to get pregnant in March of 2009 and didn't conceive until September of 2010. With Addie we never used birth control after Kellen was born, and it took us about a year of actively ttc before we got pregnant. Both times it was the hardest and most emotional thing I had ever gone through. Both times I had literally given up hope of actually getting pregnant.
ReplyDeleteI really agree that a lot of women feel a sense of shame when they go through a long rough period of trying to conceive, and it's great if you to offer your ear and your support for people in that position.
As far as when to announce, I waited with Kellen until week 12 but couldn't wait with Addie and I spilled the beans the week we found out. It really comes down to personal preference, and again it's great that you are encouraging women to do what they feel is best and not listen to what is "normal" or "acceptable" in the views of the world.
Rock on Mama, you will be (are) an amazing Mama to Mr. Uri!